Who Gets Invited To Your Wedding and How Do You Decide?

deb36bff8e4b49b5e88db5d17c79440aIt is such an exciting time planning your wedding and future.  But sometimes deciding who to invite to your wedding can drain you emotionally.  Realistically you cannot invite everyone you have ever known, worked with or went to school with.  So how do you decide?  Ask yourself these simple questions when looking at your prospective guest list:

  • Have you ever met the person?  If you couldn’t pick them out of a line up, then you shouldn’t invite them to share your special day.  And that goes for your mother who wants to invite her friends or your father wanting to invite his business associates to your wedding.  Unless the budget for your wedding can support inviting people you don’t know, then you need to stand firm that this is your wedding to celebrate with your friends and family.
  • If you do know the person, when did you see them last?   Do you have knowledge of their lives or is only what you see on Facebook?  If you haven’t seen them in over a year or at least had a conversation with them recently, don’t invite them.  If you can’t describe what is going on in their day-to-day life, then you really aren’t that close.  Send an invitation to someone you see regularly.
  • Do you think you will be close to this person in the next 5-10 years?  What about co-workers?  If you don’t see yourself keeping in connect with the person after you leave your job, then don’t invite them.  But if you already see them after work or on weekends, then they are a friend and should be invited.
  • Were you in their wedding?  It is customary to reciprocate and have them in your wedding or at least invite them to yours.  But if you have lost daily contact and your only communication is a Christmas card, then they shouldn’t get an invitation.  Sending an announcement would be perfectly acceptable.
  • What about extended family?  They should always be invited unless that person is disruptive and a negative influence. Surround yourself with people who love you and will be a positive influence in your life.  Generally if you see these relatives at holidays or other family events, then inviting them to your wedding is a good idea.
  • If you moved out of state, would you want to see this person when you came back to visit?  I have friends who moved to Colorado and whenever they come back to Texas to visit their parents, we get together for dinner.  If I was getting married again, I would want them to be there.  Some friends bridge that distance and remain close no matter what.

By going through these questions, you will know who is really important to you and who you want to see when you turn around at the altar.  Sharing your wedding day with your closest friends and family adds joy to an already joyous occasion.

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